psychic bitrate

Time to make words spew forth!

Dave has decided to hightail it for Paula's house for a few days, for the which I don't blame him in the least. We've run out of both mind-altering amenities, namely alcohol and weed, and are well on the way to running completely out of money as well. I don't reasonably expect to get paid again till next Friday. Big Z, the guy who's got to mack the payroll work before I can finish it, him and his wife just had their third baby this week and he's been ensconced in the hospital almost 24/7 since then. Main boss gave me the day off today in exchange for me coming in to work tomorrow. There's a 2 o'clock meeting I've got to make but I think I'll come in earlier than that to catch up on some of the work I've gotten behind on due to book-reading and various crises this week.

I'm listening to Battles using a little player window I popped up from their MySpace page, and lemme tell ya, it's going to take a looong while for me to get sick of it. Some music, if you're tuned to the transformation the music-maker was doing when they composed it, jump you right into a mental state. And Atlas by Battles sounds to me exactly like gravity. Makes me dance--nigh involuntarily the first few times I heard it. Wonderful stuff, Pearl was absolutely right about it. In the Fairies deck that Amber gave me a couple years ago, there's one card called Pixies. You picture them dancing halfway through the ground, this mass of ultra-cool invisible beings whose constant rhythmic movement mirrors, participates in, helps to continually create, the magnetic and gravitational field of the planet. Ridiculous? Patently. Needlessly multiplying entities? Absolutely. But psychologically effective in maintaining mental states I find most desirable for everyday functioning. Without a qualm.

Most of the things I believe are like that. The finite incarnate, my "sock puppet theory of God", is like that too. One God. One soul. Nigh-endless incarnations, each with its awareness of the others and of its original Self reduced to the merest pinprick, so that free will is not a joke. Just the uncomfortable aftereffect of a divinely Self-imposed time lag in communications. You can think of the many incarnations, every living creature that is, was, or shall be, as sequential, one after the other if you like. But since the original and final Being is beyond time, envelops and transcends time/space/matter/energy, the term is meaningless. The incarnations are, from God's perspective, simultaneous. So I'm God and you're God and so is that tree and that microscopic dust mite and that sapient supergalactic cluster. All the rights and all the responsibilities of the creator, still ours, not divided, just limited by the form of the incarnation in question. We can't return to our godlike powers and knowledges unless and until we quit this mortal coil, the envelope of self and all its accoutrements.

I think of that as one of those supreme ironies that reveals God's sense of humor. Like how you can turn lead into gold, it's just not useful to do so because the process makes the created gold massively radioactive. Same way, we all theoretically have all the might and majesty of the Supreme Being. We just can't access any more of it than our incarnate selves have already got, without completely annihilating said incarnate selves.

I want to write more Anatomy of Trust stuff, too. My trepidation on the subject has gone down and down as the months wear on. Assuredly, once people figure out how damn useful it is, some will use it for evil. But it's so frustrating to have it, and see people around me that I like and care about not be able to use it. I want them to be able to! I want to put tools in the hands of my fellow Beings that can help them access all that is available to their incarnate Selves! To make themselves greater and more wondrous and thus, when death and its final upload takes us, increase the glory of God. Why else are we all here?